28th December 2008
After a bit of free breakky I check out and head over to Matty’s house to dump my stuff and head off. Its a sunday morning. and there is only one thing to do in London if your an Antipodean. Yep, that is The Church. We’ll get to that in a minute.
But Matt and I think we’re being smart by just wearing a T-shirt out. Bad Mistake. Its fucking cold as. But our idea was its gonna be hot inside this joint. We head off to meet some of Matt’s friends from back home. And we get off at Russel Square.
Note to anyone using Russel Square tube station. Take the elevator. Those stairs are fucking hectic. There is about 500 of the things. Ok ok, maybe not 500 but there is over 200. It sucked. A lot.
We decide to grab a coffee inside a place. Too cold to be waiting in that coldness. And the gang turns up. Theres a few suprises like Amber for Uni. And we set off onto the Northern Line to Kentish town.
Now, for those who havent been to London. The church is kind of an institution for Aussies, Kiwi’s and Saffa’s. Its basically a concert venue where you pretty much drink as much as possible for 4 hours. So we do what any person does with a bar stocked full of beer. We drink as much as possible. There was a range of entertainment from bad strippers to boat races. A typical party basically.
On the way to the tube station, I suddenlz get the urge to pee really badly. So I do what I can only think of when there is no public bathroom around. Find the nearest alley and go for a quick whiz.
This all turns sour after about 5 seconds of relief. A tap on my shoulder. A voice saying `Put it in your pants’. And I swing my head and see a Security guard. I try to shake as much out. But its no use. I twist my head some more and see the boys in blue. Oh shit. So i finish up and poke it back in. I go to leave and the cops ask me to come back. They basically said ‘We didnt see you do anything, but if you get caught urinating in public its an 80 pound fine’. Oh jesus, 80 quid for a noncahlent piss. shit. Will definitely not try that again.
We make our way to Shebu….the infamous Walkabout. Terrible. I have to pee still, and the pain gets unbearable, so i get off at Euston and bolt to the toilet upstairs. Pure relief. And meet the others at Shepards Bush. Where we continue to get our drink on. Plenty of snakebites were consumed. And make our way back to Matts, and its the first time I have absolutely no idea where I am. Maybe its because I am incredibly wasted or its night. But I had no idea where the hell we were going. But Matt’s been here a good half a year, lets hope he remembers.
We get to Matt’s and crash. Not before Nikki claims we’re not as bad as she expected….next time go harder.